Jun 11, 2008

Today's Spam Salad - 6/11/08

Boost your acting in bed. {from 'gino.baroni'}

"Super-size dreams come true! http://{you.are.a.stinky.spammer}.com"


Today's spam addresses one of the most important parts of my life. Specifically, 'acting in bed.'

Yes, I like to act in bed. In particular, I like to perform the opening beach battle from 'Saving Private Ryan' and selected scenes from 'Steel Magnolias'. Don't worry, I play the Tom Skerritt part from the metal flower movie.

It's really one of my favorite hobbies. Just the other day I found myself performing the cliff jumping scene from 'Butch Cassidy and The Sundance Kid'. I think it was one of my best performances ever. Especially considering that this performance, like all the others, took place with me being the only living creature in the room.

It follows that I'm usually pretty exhausted from these award worthy performances, (I'm not sure what award they're worthy of but I'm sure there's GOT to be one), so I go to bed afterwards. These do lead to some odd but fascinating dreams, (the night I acted out the lobby scene from 'The Matrix' was a memorable one), but I'm not sure I'd refer to them as 'Super-size'. What's more, I'm really certain there's no way to make them 'come true'.

I think that the spammers are loons to suggest that my bed acting inspired dreams could come true. I'm as sane as they come and even I know THAT.

Spammers don't have dreams.

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